Of Divorce and Dependents
TRANSLATION
(1) And he left that place and went into the region of Judea beyond the Jordan. And crowds of people gathered again, and he taught them as was his custom. (2) And some Pharisees came and, in order to test him, asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” (3) Jesus asked them, “What did Moses command you?” (4) They said, “Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away.” (5) But Jesus said to them, “Because your hearts were hard Moses wrote this law for you. (6) But from the beginning of creation, God ‘made them male and female. (7) For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, (8) and the two will become one flesh,’ so they are no longer two but one flesh. (9) What, therefore, God has joined together, let no one separate.” (10) When they were in the house, the disciples asked him about this. (11) And he said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her. (12) And if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.”
(13) Then some were bringing children to him so that he might touch them. And the disciples rebuked them. (14) But when Jesus saw this, he was indignant and said to them, “Let the children come to me. Do not forbid them, for to such belongs the Kingdom of God. (15) Truly I tell you, whoever will not receive the Kingdom of God as a child will not enter it.” (16) And he took the children in his arms and blessed them, placing his hands on them.
OBSERVATIONS
In seeking to undermine Jesus’ authority, the Pharisees raised with Jesus the thorny issue of divorce. This segment contains several significant repetitions. Four times we find the word “divorce” (vss. 2, 3, 11, & 12), three times the words “wife” (vss. 2, 7, & 11) and “child(ren)” (vss. 13, 14, & 15), and twice the words “Moses” (vs. 3), “command(ment)” (vss. 3 & 5), “commits adultery” (vss. 11 & 12), and “Kingdom of God” (vss. 14 & 15). In short order Jesus clarified what God desires for human flourishing in two important areas. First, he set forth the importance of lifelong commitments for married couples and then he demonstrated how the most vulnerable, namely children, should be treated. In each case, his responses challenged the assumptions both of his disciples and of the society in which he was ministering.
OUTLINE
I. Jesus set forth God’s desire for lifelong commitments in marriage. (1-12)
II. Jesus demonstrated God’s love for society’s most vulnerable, namely children. (13-16)
IDEA STATEMENT
We should never welcome divorce, but we should always welcome children, not only to bless them, but also to learn from them.
APPLICATION
Couples whose marriages have ended in divorce have inevitably experienced bitter disillusionment and disappointed expectations. The rapturous joy most brides and grooms experience on their wedding day all too often turns into a sense of entrapment in a relationship of unwanted responsibilities and deep resentments as couples realize that what they had originally hoped would be a permanent delight has turned into a prison they desperately wish to escape.
Jesus’ phrase, “because of your hardness of heart,” aptly describes what happens in a failed marriage. Instead of selflessly seeking what is best for the other person, marriage partners become preoccupied with defending their own interests, rights, and patterns of life. They find themselves hurt and wanting to hurt their partner. They become resentful and unforgiving, settled into a pattern of self-protection and self-justification. They no longer seek to work together in a mutual endeavor of becoming “one flesh” but act as rivals, even enemies, striving to maintain their individual interests despite being bound together legally as marriage partners.
In previous generations due to societal pressures, loveless couples tended to remain together for the sake of appearances or for the sake of their children. In today’s world, divorce has become the accepted outcome of many if not most struggling marriages. Sociologists tell us that nearly half the marriages formed in America now end in divorce. Jesus’ words in Mark 10 make it clear that this was never God’s intent for any marriage relationship. His desire has always been for couples to learn to love each other selflessly and to experience the oneness that no other earthly relationship can provide.
Whenever those of us who are married find ourselves feeling stressed or frustrated, we should first examine ourselves asking, “Is this problem due to my hardness of heart?” If more of us were willing to take personal responsibility for selfish behavior and commit ourselves by God’s enablement to seek the best for the person we earlier vowed to love, the option of divorce would, in many cases, quickly disappear. Those couples that have endured stressful times and by God’s grace have rekindled their love for one another gladly attest to the joy they have experienced in their renewed devotion. Most divorcees have simply given up too quickly and have abandoned what could have been a lifelong adventure of mutual growth in godliness.